Show of Affection

Laurence Klavan

Chopping noises. Then—a scream.

Lights up suddenly on the kitchen of a suburban home. We also see a dining room table, set for a holiday meal. Her finger bleeding, Elyse has cut herself while chopping vegetables on a countertop. A bottle and glass of wine are nearby. She is in her late twenties, pretty, already somewhat blowsy. She sucks blood from the finger. Then she presses it with her thumb and holds it up.

Behind her, Alan, her twin brother, enters. He is pale, thin, and delicate. Straight? Gay? He has never given himself the chance to know. He is carrying an environmentally friendly bag of groceries.

ALAN

Hi.

Elyse turns. He is pressing and holding up his finger, too. She looks at him.

ELYSE

What are you doing?

ALAN

I thought it was a new kind of greeting. How everyone in the city was doing it or something.

ELYSE

Don’t be an idiot. I cut myself, that’s all.

ALAN

Oh.

Sheepishly, he lowers his hand. He puts down the bag, takes off his coat. She offers him some wine.

ELYSE

Here’s something everyone is doing.

ALAN

At four-thirty in the afternoon?

ELYSE

If you’re my twin brother, how come you’re an old woman? Huh? How did that happen? (drinks)

ALAN

Excuse me for caring about you, okay?

ELYSE

If that’s what you want to call it. If you really cared, you’d actually help me with something—like dinner.

ALAN

(opening his bag)

I brought hummus treats, tofurky, and my seitan sweet potatoes.

ELYSE

Great. I hope you enjoy them. The rest of us are having food.

He endures this slight.

ALAN

Where are Mom and Dad?

ELYSE

Dad’s taking a nap. Mom left me in charge when she went out shopping. (checks her watch) Awhile ago.

ALAN

I’ll keep a lookout.

Alan looks out a window.

ALAN

Are they really going to do it? Fill in the pool?

ELYSE

What are they supposed to do?

ALAN

I don’t know, but—

ELYSE

It’s too sad. The Lewises should have kept that dog on a leash. While Mom and Dad were on vacation, she got loose and wandered into the backyard. She thought she was free but she was really lost. She got stuck on the pool tarp and couldn’t escape, as if she was on an ice flow. When they got back, they found her there, frozen. They’ll have to scrape her off with a shovel. Or else just wait for the weather to get warm.

ALAN

God rest her soul.

Elyse rolls her eyes. She attends to chopping again.

ALAN

A dead dog is awful enough. But did anyone else notice the—

ELYSE

What, you mean near the front door?

ALAN

Yes. Did anybody even—casually—comment on it?

ELYSE

Not yet.

ALAN

Really? It was the first thing I saw when I came in.

ELYSE

Well, you always were the sensitive one, weren’t you?

ALAN

It was once part of a human being. That was what Kenny Tragora was.

ELYSE

If you say so. He was apparently something else, too.

ALAN

What’s that?

ELYSE

A vourdalak.

Alan just stares at her.

ALAN

What? Who was?

ELYSE

Kenny Tragora.

ALAN

No—that’s—he was an orthodontist.

ELYSE

An orthopedist.

ALAN

And a Republican fundraiser. He had three beautiful and obnoxious children. Every Christmas, he would put all those blinding lights on his house. Then he would dress up as Santa and drive down his street in a sleigh pulled by his two little dogs—

ELYSE

Dandy Dinmonts.

ALAN

—waving and throwing big pieces of fruit and candy to kids. It was embarrassing and pathetic and everyone loved it. Last year he was even hit by a bicycle but was unhurt. He was a vourdalak?!

ELYSE

It might sound silly, but that’s what everyone says.

ALAN

Huh. So that’s why his head is sitting on a spike outside the house.

ELYSE

Exactly.

ALAN

But why couldn’t he have just been—stabbed through the heart?

ELYSE

For a little insurance, I guess.

ALAN

That seems insecure.

ELYSE

Whatever.

ALAN

The mailman’s been putting letters in his mouth.

ELYSE

I saw, but only the magazines. And everyone’s a comedian.

ALAN

It’s a little—unseasonal. That’s my feeling. It’s unfestive.

ELYSE

(shrugs)

One man’s meat. (oven bell goes off) And speaking of meat—

She attends to a turkey in the oven.

ALAN

But why hang him here? I mean, vourdalaks are vampires who only kill the people they love. Who are then turned into vourdalaks themselves. Some say there are entire towns of them here in the Hudson Valley. Like Rhinebeck. That’s why it was burned to the ground and replaced by a giant CVS. But in Beacon? We’re a guiding light, right?

ELYSE

(attending to bird)

I hope this is done. Does this look done to you?

ALAN

And why our house? Kenny Tragora was a nice guy and all, but who here loved—

ELYSE

It’s a rumor, all right? It’s an old wives’ tale. Why must you take it all so seriously? Why are you always picking at everything? First it was your face when we were little. Then it was the food on my plate, so I wouldn’t get fat. Now it’s life itself. Why can’t you just let things be?

ALAN

I’m concerned, is that a crime? Concerned about who would kill Kenny Tragora, cut off his head, and leave it near our lawn.

ELYSE

We’ll take him down after Thanksgiving. All right? Let’s not let it spoil our meal.

Behind them, their father, Ron, has entered.

RON

It was his wife.

He has recently awakened. In upper middle age, he seems gentle, wears glasses and a fusty winter sweater.

ELYSE

What? What do you mean?

ALAN

Hi, Dad.

He kisses his father. But it goes unnoticed.

RON

I saw her. Nadine Tragora. From the upstairs bathroom, while I was standing, peeing, and looking out the window. She didn’t even park her car. She just left it running at the curb, got out—the door still open, that annoying little bell audible from upstairs—pulled her husband’s head out of a Barnes and Noble bag and stuck it where the guy usually hangs our dry cleaning.

ALAN

But—

RON

(closing the subject)

Well, she must have had a reason. Mustn’t she?

This causes an awkward pause. Elyse has turned.

ELYSE

Mom.

Her mother, Lorna, is standing in the doorway. She is a formidable woman in upper middle age. Annoyed, she carries a round object crudely wrapped in an expensive scarf. Hair sticks out of the top. She refers to it.

LORNA

Did no one see this hanging outside?

ALAN

I did. Hi, Mom.

He kisses her. But it goes unnoticed. During this, clearly uncomfortable, Ron grabs his coat, starts out.

RON

I’ll go pick up the pumpkin cheesecake…

The action continuous, he exits, as Lorna comes farther in. Elyse is also clearly uncomfortable.

LORNA

Well, did no one think to—it’s not like it’s a Christmas wreath, or something. It’s a little—unsightly—wouldn’t you say?

ELYSE

Did you get more wine?

LORNA

(realizing)

I left it in the car.

ELYSE

Can I have the keys?

She gives them to her. The action continuous, Elyse exits, and, as she’s going—

LORNA

You know, a little effort wouldn’t have hurt anyone. I don’t know why I have to do everything around here—

Lorna has moved to the garbage. She steps on the pedal, opens it, drops the object and scarf in. Then she lifts her foot and shuts it.

LORNA

And that was a very nice scarf, too.

Alan tries to put his arm around her.

ALAN

Someone else will simply own it now. They’ll discover the scarf in the garbage dump. Even objects have their own journey.

Lorna just looks at him.

LORNA

My little Gandhi. I guess I couldn’t have expected you to—take the lead.

He endures this slight. She has taken off her coat. She turns. He looks at her.

ALAN

Mom, there’s … a little bit of blood.

LORNA

What? Where?

ALAN

On your—at your breast.

LORNA

(looks down)

This? Oh, no, that’s—nothing. Someone must have just—spilled something—cranberry sauce. It’s the season for it. A breeze must have just blown some cranberry sauce on me, that’s all. I could use some club soda to—

ALAN

No, it’s blood. Above your heart. It looks like someone tried to—stab you there, to—

LORNA

I pushed my American flag pin in too hard, that was it. I liked it so much, I felt so patriotic, I almost—punctured—my own heart. Some positive feelings can be fatal. Let me simply get some seltzer and—

He is obeying, moving. She